Life Ain't Easy
by yaoidarkness16
Summary: I was just minding my own business, you know, working an eight hour shift, when an arrogant, know-it-all prince came in. He smashed a cup right next to my feet. What was I supposed to do? Let him get away with that? Not a bloody chance!
1. Discoveries

**|Story— Life ain't Easy|**

**|Chapter One— Discovery|**

"Caroline, did you steal my hairdryer?"

I squinted at the screeching sound and shut my eyes tighter as I pretended it was just part of what had previously been a very good dream.

"Caroline, I know it was you! You always steal my stuff!"

Not now. I growled viscerally as I rolled over to my other side and forced my pillow over my ears to block out the noise. I tried to imagine myself in a more peaceful setting. It would be warm, so warm that the sunshine would melt on my body and cover me in its glorious love. I smiled as I surrounded myself with the gentle serenity of pounding waves. I let out a sigh as I pretended to feel the cool sand in my toes. My eyelids drooped down lazily.

"Caroline!"

My pillow was viciously forced from my hands. "Grrr-aphh!" I yelled out in protest.

"Get up! Ned's coming to pick me up in a half an hour, and my hair's still wet!"

"Put it up," I grumbled grouchily and rolled over again to avoid her.

She 'humphed' loudly, and I felt her weight leave my bed. Sweet success! I grinned in triumph and allowed myself to succumb to my slumber once again.

"Get up!" she commanded me.

I refused to move. My bed was just too lovely and warm and safe. I sighed as I savored the scent of my sheets and ignored my roommate's presence, something she was also very adept at doing— unless, of course, she wanted something.

"Caroline!" she screeched.

I heard the sound of my yellow curtains being yanked open and immediately moved to block the light out with my hand. It was too early and too bright.

"Caroline!" she called out again.

"Shh," I attempted to placate her. If I closed my eyes even tighter, it was almost dark again. "It's sleep time."

"Caroline, get up now," she ordered. Her voice was firm. It made her sound silly.

I held onto my sheets tightly and refused to move.

"Fine," she huffed. "If you're going to be such a brat about it, I'll just force you to get up."

Then, suddenly, she was poking and prodding me everywhere. Her bony fingers stung as she attacked me.

I slapped her hands away deliriously. "Go away," I groaned. "Come back tomorrow."

Her fingers never relented. I squirmed in my sheets.

"Go away," I repeated petulantly.

"Not until you give me back my hairdryer," she insisted as she gave me a sharp prod in the side.

"Ow!" I whined in pain. "Leave me alone. I don't have your bloody hairdryer!"

"Yes, you do. Now get up!"

She started shaking me, and that's when I had no choice but to retaliate. I used my fists, elbows, and legs to punch, kick, and jab anything I came into contact with.

Bonnie screamed shrilly, "God, Caroline! Stop it! You're hurting me!"

"Get out of my room!" I demanded. My voice still sounded sleepy. I pulled my overlarge T-shirt down so at least I could seem slightly more threatening without my 'Candy-of-the-Week' underwear showing.

"No. You need to get up," and with that, she grabbed my sheets, yanked as hard as she could with her frail, freakishly bony arms, and pulled them off of my protesting body.

I looked around in a daze. I was on the floor.

"Bonnie!" I thundered.

Bonnie simply rolled her eyes in that snobbish way she did ever since she got her silver Lexus. "Don't be so dramatic, Caroline," she told me in a condescending tone. "Anyway," she continued, "I need you to give me back my hairdryer because I'll die if Ned sees my looking less than perfect."

My jaw dropped. There were just too many ways to insult my roommate in this glorious moment in time. I could not pick just one. Staring at her incredulously, I wondered how she could even bring herself to get out of bed every morning, let alone dragging me along with her.

"You'll catch hepatitis if you keep your mouth open for that long," Bonnie snapped snottily.

She would know. "It's flies," I corrected her.

She shrugged. "Tomato, tomato."

I stared at her in awe before grabbing my bed for support as I struggled to get onto my feet.

"Good, you're up," she commented coolly.

"Yeah, and I'm going back to bed. Good night. Leave," I told her.

She grabbed my arm and wrapped her fingers around it like a shackle that prevented me from plopping down onto my beautiful bed. "Not until you give me back my hairdryer."

I yanked my arm out of her grasp angrily. "I already told you I don't have it! I can just dry my hair magically, remember? I don't need hairdryers anymore."

"Oh, that's right. You're a freak," she recalled lightly, as though she had really just remembered her roommate was a runaway Asgardian with magical powers.

"The politically correct term is magically inclined," I shot back cheekily.

"I know a freak when I see one," she assured me.

I was just about to ask her if she had looked in a mirror lately when Bonnie remembered that she had another purpose in life besides making mine miserable. Herself.

"Well, if you don't have my hairdryer, where is it? I already checked the bathroom. This is the only other place it could be."

I sighed and rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand. If I could get back in bed in the next two minutes, I could manage to get some more coveted sleep. If not, I would be up for the rest of the day. "Did you check under your bed?" I asked dully.

"Oh, crap," she realized as she rushed out of my room.

Rolling my eyes, I sauntered back to my bed. Not ten seconds later I heard the soft humming of the hair dryer from across the hall. I chuckled quietly to myself as I grabbed my pillow from the floor and placed it behind my head. My eyes closed happily as I hugged the pillow to my chest. I had made it just before the two minutes were over. I imagined my previous dream. The bananas were just about to join the monkeys in a tap-dance routine.

"CAROLINE!"

Startled, I flipped off of my bed. I looked around again. Great, I really hadn't been spending enough time with the floor. The carpeting was lovely and very, very hard. I rubbed my butt gingerly. Sometimes I wished I didn't choose the pseudo name Caroline.

"Caroline!" she said again.

I looked up. My _wonderful_ roommate was looming over me with expectancy. God forbid if I didn't spend my life catering to Bonnie's every fancy.

"What?" I croaked. I made a mental note to change the lock on my door. Bonnie didn't need magic. She had bobby pins. "What could you possibly want now?" I grumbled as I scrunched my blonde bed head with my fingers.

"I need to borrow one of your skirts," Bonnie told me frantically. I loved that it did not come out as a question. Her eyes were wide with distress. It had been such an eventful morning for her. I imagined torturing your younger roommate was quite stressful. "I spilled water on mine, and now it's all wet," she explained as she forced my closet open and pulled out my clothes frenetically.

"It's just water," I cajoled her. "There's not even a stain on your skirt."

"But it's all wet!" Bonnie insisted as she placed one of my pairs of pants against her lower body.

"Why didn't you just dry it with your hairdryer?"

Bonnie shrugged as she pressed another pair of my pants up against her. "Ah, well," she sighed. "It's too late now." She looked at herself in my mirror before shaking her head and throwing the pants down onto my floor.

My mouth agape, I watched silently as she proceeded to do this with ten more items.

"God, Caroline, don't you have anything decent to wear?"

"I like my clothes," I defended. I valued comfort, but most of my clothes were also stylish. I enjoyed coming home to a full wardrobe. Wearing armor everyday was practical and a real timesaver, but it did make things rather dull. My Midgardian clothes were my way of getting the spontaneity out of my system. "Besides, most of my clothes are your hand-me-downs," I reminded Bonnie as I watched her cast aside a pair of shorts she had given me a year ago because she deemed them too long.

"And they looked much better on me," commented Bonnie as she pulled out a light pink skirt from the back of my closet.

I wrinkled my nose. I never wore that skirt. Bonnie had given it to me last year for my birthday, but it was _way_ too short for my liking. I couldn't even bend over without people catching a glimpse of my nether regions.

"Perfect," Bonnie cooed happily.

"Figures," I muttered under my breath. I grabbed my robe and then walked toward the door. "I'm going to go take a shower," I announced. "Clean this up while I'm gone," I told her as I gestured to the mountain of clothes lying on the floor.

Bonnie gave me a dirty look that I childishly responded to by sticking out my tongue.

"Whatever, freak."

I grinned ironically at her term of endearment before making my way to the bathroom. I took my time in the shower. I loved the therapeutic pounding of water against my back and the scent of my strawberry shampoo. I had been using the same kind ever since I was little because my mum said it matched my hair.

I was the only redhead in my entire family. My dad said he had a great Aunt once who was a redhead. I guess I just hit the genetic lottery, and not just with the whole hair thing. I laughed as I magically shaved my legs and then dried my hair in a matter of seconds. I really was a freak.

Well, after five years, Bonnie was bound to be right about something. I didn't mean for her to find out about my… um… _abilities_, but living with her for so long she was bound to find out. Whatever. Like anyone would believe her ramblings about a 'freaky roommate'. Her words not mine.

I examined myself closely in the mirror. A light dusting of freckles was painted on my face since it's genetically impossible for a girl with dark red hair not have some form of freckles. My hair, unlike Bonnie's bone straight blonde hair, had a bit of a wave to it. It framed my face nicely. My eyes were a very bright blue. Bonnie said I looked like Ariel from _The Little Mermaid_. She was right, of course; I didn't blend in. It took me a long time to accept the fact that I was just not normal.

I was still getting used to it.

I sighed and looked away. I might be a 'god', but at least I didn't have freakishly bony fingers.

I secured my robe around my body and marched back into my room. Bonnie was gone, thank god, and, as could be expected, my clothes were still strewn all over the floor. I sighed as I leaned over to pick up a pair of pants.

"Bloody roommate," I grumbled when I finally returned my last article of clothing to its proper place. I quickly slipped into a pair of black leggings, a jean skirt, a black no-sleeved shirt, then a longer shirt underneath that had black and white stripes, then I finished it off with a brown leather belt and a jean vest. I want to look pretty. My entire day was foiled with my unsavory wakeup call. Really, the way you woke up could affect your entire day. So, I need to at least try and make it salvageable. Still, I added a touch of eyeliner and mascara just in case the day would not turn out to be a total bust.

I made my bed next and placed all of my pillows neatly over my mint green quilt in a specific pattern. I went to retrieve my laundry from the dryer and was about midway through with folding all of it when I heard the buzzing of my alarm clock. Ugh. How could I forget? I have to go into work today, my shift at a lovely little diner that I hate so much.

I reached over and placed my hand on the annoying and insistent little pain in my arse and silenced its constant buzzing.

I then grabbed my purse and my phone before heading down the hall. I looked at the coffee table in the living room and grabbed two mismatched socks. Ain't nobody got time for matched socks. I tugged them on and jammed my feet into my brown boots. It'll figure itself out. Eventually. I hoped.

"See ya Bon-Bon," I said over the door, "and clean up my room!" She better.

I left, wanting some space and fresh air, especially from my roommate. I swung my keys around as I whistled cheerily. Then I unlocked my car and got in.

I started up the car with a twist in the ignition and heard the purr of the engine. Ah, music to my ears. I turned my back around and began to back out of the lot. Then I drove my way over to the diner and parked in one of the employee sections. AKA, the way back.

I got out of my car and locked it with a double click. Then I pocketed my keys into my purse. I made my way over to the door whilst humming happily. See? My day is already getting better. I listened to Beyoncé and Jay Z. Totally my OTP celebrity couple, by the way. And now I felt like I could take on this nine hour shift surrounded by hot chicken grease.

"'Sup Car?" Flo asked.

"Nothing much," I told her as I set my stuff down in the break room. I had some time to spare. "What are you doing over there?"

I then grabbed my apron and name tag before I went to work on putting them on correctly.

"Shh," she hushed me as she flailed her hand in my direction to make me simmer down.

It had the opposite effect, "No, you're acting pretty weird. I want to know."

"I'm looking through the window," said Flo, never tearing her eyes away from whatever she was gazing at, in a snotty voice.

Fighting the urge to roll my eyes because there was no one around to appreciate my sense of humor, I asked another question. "Why?"

"There's a cute guy out there," she told me in between a high-pitched giggle.

I couldn't help it; I rolled my eyes. "I wouldn't exactly call our manager cute," I told her, knowing her silly attempts to get a raise. "Able to swallow a whale, possibly– but cute, no."

Flo was so annoyed that she actually turned to look in my direction. "It's not Garry. I don't know who he is. I just thought he was cute."

"You mentioned," I replied dryly. Disinterested, I went back to tying my apron.

"Not that there's anything wrong with Garry," continued Flo pensively. "He's a very special individual, and he's completely infatuated with me."

"Who wouldn't be?" I mumbled to myself sarcastically.

"It's just that the guy out there is all kinds of sexy. Look at those biceps! And the way his butt looks when he walks, God," she paused to fan herself dramatically. "I just wish I could see his face. I wonder why he's here. If I was a guy and looked like that I wouldn't be at a dive like this. Maybe I should go say hi."

"I'm sure our manager would love that. I'm looking forward to that conversation. 'Sorry, mate, but Flo already left with some man-god with a nice rear and there's no one to cover her shift.'"

"I might like Garry and all, but I'm still a woman with eyes. It's not a crime to appreciate the opposite sex. I'm perfectly normal."

"Lucky you," I kept my tone indifferent. If I did not engage, maybe she would finally get bored and leave me alone.

"Not that you would know anything about it," Flo prattled on. "You never date. You probably don't even know what a cute guy looks like."

I bit down on my tongue. I kept trying to think of soothing images to keep my temper from flaring. I concentrated on my name tag. If I could just keep focusing on not stabbing my chest with the long, thin needle, everything would be okay.

"Not that it would matter. I highly doubt a guy that hot would want to date you? I mean, no offense, he's like _other worldly_ hot!"

I clutched my fist angrily.

"Really?" I goaded her. "So you don't think there's any way that guy in there might prefer me over you?"

Eyebrow raised, Flo appraised me snobbishly for a few moments before scoffing in my direction, "I doubt it."

Now, I was angry. What was so wrong with me? I strode over to the window to peer out and peep at the guy. She was right. He looked pretty damn lickable. His dark blue shirt was tight around his muscles, and his jean hung perfectly around his hips. Window Boy also had a head of hair that screamed well care for. It was thick and blonde and shiny, the kind you just wanted to run your fingers through. Yes, this guy was cute. Yet, there was no reason for Flo to turn to mush at the mere stalking of him or for her to suggest that I would not be able to attract his interests. I had just as good of a shot with Window Boy as she did.

I had boyfriends. There might not have been many, but a few guys throughout the centuries had shown interest. I had flirted. I had dressed up and put on lip gloss. I could be just as obnoxiously estrogen-filled as everyone else. Hell, I was called a love goddess when I lived in Asgard. I was Freyja Njörðrdotter and I could get a boyfriend if I so desired.

"There's no reason why he wouldn't want to date me," I told her.

"Please," Flo laughed. "Like he'd want to go out with anyone in this diner."

"Let's go find out," I snapped. I stormed out of the break room and rushed through the kitchen before approaching the door.

"Caroline!" Flo called after me as she tried to keep up. "What are you doing? Stop it!"

"No," I yelled out to her. "We're going to ask Window Boy what he thinks."

"Don't!' Flo shouted.

"What?" I called out haughtily. "Afraid?" I taunted as I grasped the door knob.

Flo arrived a few seconds after than me and took a few deep breaths to steady her heart rate. She eyed me before looking at the doorknob. "Of you," she jeered. "Never."

Then she opened the door.

I walked through and came to skidding stop when I got a look at his face. My heart rate picked up in panic. I would know that handsome face anywhere. I could feel my cheeks heating and draining from my face at the same time. Why? Why is Thor Odinson here? Was he still that arrogant son of a bitch that I hated so much? I hoped not.

My mind was reeling with too many thoughts trying to figure all that out. It didn't help when Flo, from behind the bar, snickered.

"Hey, can I have some eggs sunny side up?" A dark haired with glasses said.

"Um, sure," I mumbled as I scribbled on the notepad.

Is he here to force me to go back to Asgard? No. I wasn't going to allow that, whatsoever. I would fight him if I had to. I would. I wasn't going to back, he couldn't make me. And I couldn't believe I had a conversion about his butt.

Suddenly the man I was having an internal crisis over spoke up, "This drink. I like it."

"Yeah, it's great right?" Four Eyes said.

Thor hurled the empty mug at the ground, shattering it. Right. Next. To. My. Feet.

"Another!"

That effectively snapped me out of my stupor. The way I woke up reflected how my day was going entirely. I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and yanked him to his feet. There were several gasps, but that did little to curve my anger.

I pulled him right through the door and released him by his stretched out shirt, harshly.

"What is the meaning of this, serving wench?"

Serving wench?! Did he just call me a serving wench?!

Immediately, my fist connected with his jaw and he flew back. He skidded across the sidewalk and was stuck in the pot his head created. His body miserably stuck straight up around the cement. My strength never changed, it seemed.

I waved my fist out of the way and marched over to him. I couldn't even describe the anger I felt. With one hand on my hip, I grasped his ankle and pulled him out of the hole and let him drop. Then I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt once more and shook him profusely.

"What the hell is wrong with you, you destructive little duffus!?" I shouted in his face. "Centuries have gone by and you haven't changed at all?! Have you?! Do you know how that makes me feel?! Do you?!"

As blood flew from so many places on his face because I was still shaking his shirt, he tried to speak, "Fr-Freyja? Is that you?"

Did he just say Freyja? _What?!_

**Author's Note: Do you think I should continue this fic?**


	2. It's Hammer Time

**|Chapter Two— It's Hammer Time|**

Everything settled down, eventually. Thor's 'friends' were scared out of their wits, considerably. They were scared of our strength— namely mine— and made hasty good byes. Though, I could tell Freckles lingered and wished to talk to one of us a little longer, but Old Dude pulled her away. I sense a father-daughter relationship there. But that wasn't any of my concern. It didn't matter whatsoever to me. I wouldn't be seeing them again. I bloody hoped not.

"What are you doing here?"

"I required sustenance."

"No, you misunderstand me. What are you doing here on _this planet_? Or _this_ _realm_ even?" I said, crossing my arms over my chest whilst leaning against my car. My stare was calculating, searching for truth answers.

He looked uncomfortable, embarrassed even. When did he ever show an ounce of humility? What did the mighty Thor have to be bashful about? Now, I was super curious.

"I was banished from my home, but I will be back once I retrieve Mjölnir," he tried to look proud and arrogant once more. He succeeded fairly well, until I saw a flicker of shame.

It felt like someone let in a breath of fresh air, I wasn't going to be dragged back to Asgard. Thank all gods. It was like he didn't even give a rat's arse that I was here living amongst humans in Midgard. Excellent. I just wanted to be left alone; and by definition that meant he couldn't be here.

"Do you even know where it is?"

Always as confident as ever, "Of course I do."

"Okay fine, get in," I opened the door on the driver's side. He gave me a clueless look. Poor chap, he didn't know what a car was. Asgard sure was missing out, it was _so_ much better than riding side saddle. "Get in." I tilted my head with a playful smile towards the passenger seat. He relented and the two of use got in.

I pulled out of the diner and I began to drive towards the coordinates Thor described. It wasn't anything fancy that he said, not military mumbo jumbo crap or anything. Just thirty miles west from here; simple enough.

We drove for quite some time before he spoke, "Why are you helping me? I thought you hated me." He flashed a smile at me.

Why is he smiling at me like that? Do I have something on my face? I hoped not. I took a shower and washed my face with my Clean & Clear: Morning Burst. I had really oily skin and if I forget to wash my face red ugly splotches that matched my hair would spring up. Perhaps that was on my face? Wait, what was I worried about again? Oh well.

"I don't hate you," I gave him a side look before turning my eyes back on the broken, cracked, old road. "Sometimes I can't stand you, you get so annoying. But I don't."

"Excellent," he continued to smile broadly. He put his feet up on the dashboard and I felt my eyebrow twitch. "I can't have the only person who understands about the Nine Realms to hate me."

"Feet off the dash! I don't want it to crack," I told him. I light batted his feet with my hand. He put them down. Seriously, this car is pretty old, I don't want to start with annoyingly expensive repairs. "Thanks."

Car repairs were a bitch and a half.

"You should come back to Asgard with me. We can fly back with Mjölnir and Heimdall will let us back in." I wished I had his confidence, but I'd be an arrogant dick like him. So, I take it back.

"Sorry, bub, I'm not going back," I sighed. "I've got a live here. Plus, it's not like anyone misses me. I'll bet you ten bucks on that."

"Bucks? Why would I require deer?"

I began to laugh. Did he really just…? Oh man, that was so hilarious! I looked over to the side to him as my laughter began to cause aches; Thor looked at me like I was insane.

"What is so amusing?"

I tried to cease my giggles, "Ow my belly," I took a big gulp of air and said as steadily as I could. "It's nothing."

Eventually, we got to the place he directed me too. It was nighttime when we got out. I was glad I had long sleeves, my jean vest, and my legs. I didn't handle the cold well or the rain. Then again that was the least of our problems in getting Thor back home.

"It looks like a damn gerbil cage down there," I grumbled at the top of the hill. I looked at it with disdain, a hand on my hip and my hip jutted out a bit more than the other. "Plus, that looks it's from S.H.I.E.L.D. _Great_." I looked over at Thor and he didn't look phased. I tried a cheery tone, it sounded incredibly false and sarcastic though. "Whatever, right? I mean who should be afraid of a top secret government organization that can make people disappear without a trace?"

"Exactly." He didn't get my sarcasm.

"Wait for me!"

I ran down there to catch up with him. I slipped on the mud slightly, but I didn't fall. Thankfully. However, my smaller framed body smacked into Thor's very broad and muscular one. I steadied myself, wondering why he stopped.

"What's the problem?"

"Barrier."

I looked past him and saw a chain link fence with barb wire at the top. Pft, piece of cake. I can handle that. I think.

"Here, move over," I said, lightly batting him on the arm. He moved.

I gripped the twisted metal. Then I began to pull and it easily gave in with a ripping sound. Oh crap! That was loud. I looked around, no one was patrolling on this side. Lucky! I then stepped through the Asgardian-sized entrance I made. I looked around one last time.

"Shh, come on the coast is clear," I told him as we rushed through he muddy ground.

"Hey you guys aren't authorized to be—" Thor elbowed him in the face. He was out cold.

"Thor!" I said incredulously.

"What? Now, let us retrieve Mjöilnir."

Well, I guess there wasn't another way to do this. Fighting is the only way to go. I didn't want to hurt them, but then again I didn't want to get hurt.

A hand tried to grab me, but I grabbed his wrist, twisted it, and then broke it when I elbowed it. The man collapsed in pain. Then I saw more opponents and knew what I had to do.

"Equip!"

My basic armor consisted of a metal breastplate, with a high armored collar and plated shoulderguards with each side being composed of four plates; the armor's waist guard was composed of three plates, each held up by a simple belt. In addition, I had on a blue pleaded that fell a few inches above my knees, and a pair of tall black boots. Plus, the two equally as large swords in my hands were nice too.

God, it had been so long since I did this.

I rushed them. I spun both my arms around, slicing and dicing several that tried to surround me; it left me kneeling and my arms crossed. They dropped.

"Freyja!" Thor called for me.

"Coming!" I called back.

Then I ran over to him and followed him through the tunnel. I kept my swords close to me, so as to not rip and tear the white fabric, it would slow me down. Then several guards came through a three way intersection. _Great_.

Thor started taking down the tunnel on the left. I went for the one in the center. Two men tried to rush me from the behind and the front. I stuck one sword behind me and the other in front of me. Both stabbed their legs.

"Argh!" They screamed. I didn't want to go for the kill. They were simply doing their job and killing wasn't something I wanted to do. Ever again.

Now, they were more cautious. But they still approached. I began to spin on my heel with my swords blurring with speed. Shallow, multiple cuts marred their bodies. They fell and broke through the white fabric walls.

I had to stop quickly, "Whoa… dizzy," then I steadied myself shakily.

When the rainy dreary sky stopped spinning, I didn't see any guards left in front of me. I looked around. I began to call out for Thor to keep moving, but he wasn't anywhere in sight. Then my blue orbs scanned over a big gaping hole; that was probably where he went.

"Ugh, typical," I groaned in slight annoyance.

I progressed without him. I saw through the tunnel that it looked circular and rather important. I hummed softly as I walked forward, preparing to be friendly and if needed to be, fierce. Suddenly, my forehead hit yet another solid, large, muscly mass.

"There you are, I was looking all over… for y—" then I looked up. "Oh my. You're quite a large man."

It wasn't Thor. What stood before me was a large dark skinned man that looked at me like I was fresh meat. Well, it was fighting time again, it seemed.

"I'm going to squish you like a bug, pretty lady."

Pretty lady? Well, that was kind of nice. Then he attempted to bring his big meaty fist down on me. Now that part wasn't nice. My armored arm came up to block that strike. I saw that his stomach was open for an attack, so I used my other arm to attempt to stab him in the gut. He grasped the sword as it dug into his lower abdomen. Whoa! This guy was determined.

"Give up, I don't want to kill you," I told him.

It quickly became a power struggle. It didn't last for long because the sword sliced his hand and pierced right through his stomach and through his back. He howled. I then kicked him off of my blade. He grunted in pain.

I then frowned, feeling guilty as I stepped over him. When I entered the main control room everyone clocked their guns at me. Oh come on. This wasn't going to end well, I could sense it.

"Drop your weapons right now," a suited man with a clean cut said.

I sighed and threw my blade with precision at him. It stabbed through his coat and pinned him to the wall. The shock and effect caused him to drop his gun.

"Coulson!" Several of them shouted.

I told all of them, "I've got things to do. I don't have time for this."

I moved through the people, who moved aside reluctantly. I stepped through and saw Thor pulling at his hammer. It didn't budge. His muscles flexed, tightened, and rippled under the strain. Since when were things heavy for him? Perhaps on Midgard his strength diminished? No. He took down those guards like they were nothing. Perhaps an enchantment? Eh. More likely than not.

Then he collapsed, giving up; he roared in absolute anger and anguish.

I said in a sing-songy voice, "Someone wasn't worthy~."

I walked down towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder. I had my sword stored away, disappearing with my magic. But my armor remained. I tried to be as sympathetic and non-threatening as possible.

"Come on, let's get out of here," I told him.

He didn't respond. I sighed as gripped the back of his shirt firmly. Then I leaped, flying through the air. My magical cloak of feathers, had been converted into a feathery bracelet; it was far more convenient.

Then I equipped my sword once more to slice through the top. I looked down and the agents came rushing in. Too late for them. We flew through the top and I kept it up until we got to my car.

I panted softly, feeling exhausted, totally spent. It had been years since I fought, used magic, and flew all in one big succession. I just needed a breather. I leaned against my car and looked at Thor with somewhat bleary eyes. He was still deadened and cationic.

"Okay, let's just get out of here. I know this really nice bar; I could unwind right about now…. So tired. What do you say?"

He agreed stiffly.

**Author's Note: Be sure to review. :—D**


	3. Drunk as a Skunk

**Author's Note:**

**_|Thanking Guest Reviewers|_**

**—•Guest: Thank you and spoiler alert Loki is in it. :—)**

**|Chapter Three— Drunk as a Skunk|**

I drove away, tires spinning in the mud; I swerved in the main road with a bounce. I floored it. I wanted to get as far away as possible from those government psychos. I know we're technically the psychos since we broke into their gerbil maze and tried to nick the thing they were researching. But hey, in my defense, it wasn't theirs to begin with. It was Thor's. However, he couldn't lift it like a wimp— erm, sorry— and Mjölnir was pretty much useless.

"How are you holding up, champ?" I asked, turning my head to the side.

No response.

I frowned. Why wasn't he answering me? So what if he wasn't worthy? We had other things to worry about, like not getting shot down by the government. I turned towards him, but I jumped in surprise and shock.

"Loki!" Thor shouted, my voice box, or whatever you call it I'm not a doctor, refused to work.

I swerved. Then I tried my best to correct myself on the road, but it was hard. I was shocked. Why the hell was he here? Why was Loki, another Asgardian, here? I could barely handle having one of them here screwing up my life. I hoped I didn't need to deck him in the schnoz too.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here?!"

"I could ask the same of you, Earth woman."

_Great_, he didn't recognize me. That just made me feel _fantastic_. Jeez, it wasn't like we were best friend or anything; well…, my only friend at the time. If I wasn't busy at the moment I would reach behind me and smack as hard as I could. And speaking of being busy, I looked in my rear view mirror and saw three cars on my tail. Oh crap!

"Idiot!" I hissed, Loki looked affronted. Then I told Thor, "Hey, blondie, take the wheel. I need to give those S.H.I.E.L.D. a little greeting."

"I don't know how to operate this contraption," Thor said, looking panicked.

"Just keep the car between the yellow and white lines. If you crash it I'll take it out on you and Mister Forget-His-Childhood-Friend-And-Doesn't-Give-A-Damn."

I rolled down the window all the way, then flew through the window, leaving behind the boys. The first car I came in contact with had that guy I had pinned to the white tarp was in there. He was terrified. I smirked as I punched right through the hood; I felt my knuckles break through the engine, crushing it. As they screamed and swerved, I flipped above and behind the car as the everything under the hood exploded.

Then I landed on the ground right between the two cars behind me. I lifted my arms up, feeling my boobs bounce. Oh godammit! One thing in life will always be true, whatever kind of bra you wore or how big your boobs were, they'll always bounce when doing stuff. Then I finally feel the metal tearing, breaking against my arms, destroying the cars.

Next, I watched how the cars crashed. They started slowing down, swerving out of control in the middle of the road. Soon they piled up and flipped. I winced slightly. Finally, I ran, then flew over the cars and back to mine. I slipped back knot the window as Thor moved over.

"Took care of it," I said.

"Frejya," Loki said, a question in his tone. "Is that really you?"

"Aww, how cute, you noticed," I teased.

I heard Thor chortle softly. Wow, I didn't think I was funny. That was kind of nice. But I'm still a little pissed off that Loki didn't recognize me. Please, I was only his best friend for what eleven hundred fifty-three years? You would think that would mean something.

"It's been so long," he said. "I didn't recognize you."

I got off the main road, pulled into the bar I was talking about with another bounce, and parked like a pro. I sighed loudly. I looked back at the boys and saw that they were considerably shaken, I smiled and got out of the car. They followed suit.

"Yeah, yeah," I sighed as I looked at him.

I looked him over. He wore a dark overcoat, an even darker tie, patterned scarf, and a white collared shirt. His hair was slicked back, curled at the ends, his eyes were as green as ever. He hadn't changed much, physically. Although, there was change I picked up on instantly.

"W-wait, are you taller than me?" I asked, leaning in closer to inspect this.

He placed his flat hand to his forehead, then brought it out in a straight line towards me. I eyed it, blinking with curiosity. He, however, looked pleasantly surprised.

"I guess I am."

Immediately, without a second thought, I hugged him right around the neck. I could feel the shock, he backed up a bit, and didn't hug me back. Then slowly he returned the favor as I squeezed him hard.

"Frejya, can't breathe," he squeaked.

"Oh, sorry," I smiled.

I pulled away, moved my hair off my shoulder and tried to quell the giddiness in my heart. It had been so long; I missed him so, but I didn't know how to express it without sounding like a git.

"Freyja, do you mind if Thor and I speak alone?"

"O-okay," I scowled slightly. I shook my head, hoped Thor wouldn't come back, then left them. I double clicked the lock on my keys for my car alarm. Then I waved largely starting from shoulder 'till my hand rested back on my hip. "Take care now."

I entered the bar. I looked around, I had come to know this bar pretty well. I spend a lot of time here actually, much to my disgruntle. Either way, I sighed, and sat down. I propped my feet up on the table, leant my back against the way, folded my arms behind my head. That was how I relaxed when my body somewhat aches.

Suddenly, Thor plopped down on the seat next to me. It seemed I didn't get my wish, oh well.

"Right then. Got something that'll dull the ache a bit?" Thor mumbled.

"Actually, yes," I smiled slyly. I got up and started walking towards the bar; I motioned for Thor to follow me. "Um, on Earth we have places like bars, filled with _lovely_ beverages. Eases the hurt… makes the sun shine a little brighter, even makes boring people seem more interesting." I took a seat and a drink slid into my hand— I come here frequently— I handed it to him. "Ah, here."

Thor grinned.

Eventually we're a couple shots in. And I was right earlier. The lights were a little brighter, the air felt a little hotter, and speaking of hotter… Thor was starting to look better and better.

"So then, Loki says, 'Father is dead.'"

I leaned up slightly as I looked down, "Right," then my blue orbs focused right on his face as the outlines swam a bit. "Back to Freyr…."

Thor said scornfully, "Freyr…. Let's not waste any more breath on him."

I slammed my shot glass down, very angry, I actually felt some of the glass crack a bit. I looked at him with narrowed eyes, slightly smacking him on the arm. Thor grunted as he grasped my hand, before dropping it. His hand was hot and large, like my rage.

"But he's dead and nobody seems to care enough that it's so!"

"I care. If my brother died, I'd be a bloody mess too. What had happened to you? I probably wouldn't have recovered, and I'm an 'arrogant, boorish prince,'" he said bitterly. "According to most people."

True, but it was me time now. He was going on and on about Odin and his regrets, I listened, now it was me time. Me. Drunk me. Drunk hazy me. Hehehehe. Wait, pay. That was what I wanted to talk about, right?

I slurred, "But shouldn't he pay? Shouldn't the man who killed him pay?"

"Absolutely," Thor said patting my thigh before slowly dragging his hand away. Why was his hand so warm? Why did I feel so warm? Reflexively, I took another shot. "Take him on myself, if it wasn't for my little handicap." He made a swayie hammer motion.

I wasn't satisfied with that. I would kill himself if I knew where he was and didn't have so many shots of vodka. Mmmm vodka. Wait, I was talking about Freyr and his killer.

"Right. So… hypothetically, what do you wish you could do to him?"

Thor poured fresh shots for the both of us. "You name it, love. You're the wronged party. Something, uh… gruesome, how 'bout?"

Thor drank fast with his head tilted back. I maintained my fake-cheerful smile, drinking also.

After a few more shots, things got a little hazy. I didn't quite catch much of anything he said, except for the way his lips moved. It kinda reminded me of Freyr a little. That was when I spoke up again, rather loudly.

"Thing about it is, none of this was my idea," I said disgustedly. I poured myself another shot. "I didn't ask to be amongst humans for so long."

"Right! And I didn't ask not to be able lift my hammer," Thor shot back.

It was funny seeing him unable to lift a hunk of metal. Ha ha, weakling.

"To tell you the truth…," I put the bottle down, "all I wanted was a break. See what Midgard was like, maybe do a little damage, then come back."

"Me too. The coming back part. I just wanted to go home, forget this whole ordeal."

I felt maudlin, I bet my face was maudlin, even my posture, "Yeah… and then the trees were so pretty…. The people… naive and nice to me…." I trailed off, feeling wistful. People just weren't quite like they used to be. And the planet used to be a lot healthier and prettier.

I felt myself slump my arm against the bar table as I twirled my long hair absently. I had the craving to sit in some flowers and finish the bottle all by myself. I started drawing circles on his tan and muscly forearm. My finger kept slipping though. Oops. I just kept feeling the tight muscles.

"Yes, my Father told me I was to learn something from humans…, but I was too stupid to see it."

"Next thing you know… I'm changing to please them," I said, sitting up. I felt hostile. "I care if they care! Forgetting all about Freyr!"

"Right," he nodded, I guessed he was referring to Odin.

He took my hand off his arm since I kind of smacked it, hard. Couldn't help it. I was angry, venting even. He kept my hand though, it was warm and dwarfed mine.

"And I'm off my guard. Happy! I'm singing in the shower and doing my sexy dance?!" I said incredulously.

"Exactly!" He paused. I blinked curiously. He had a sexy dance? Thor said uncomfortably. "I… have no dance."

I gave him a look as he let go of my hand. I didn't believe him; he definitely had a sexy dance. Even through this hazy angry rant, I could tell he was lying. His face gave it away.

Suddenly I shouted, "Screw 'em!"

"To the rafters!"

Our glasses clanked together and we tilted our heads back for another shot. Oh, that burning sensation down my throat was liberating, exhilarating.

"I did everything to kill that giant who murdered my brother. Was it ever enough?"

"Never!" Thor slurred. "I was always going above and beyond. I saved the humans how many times? And I can't stand the lot of you."

"Me either! I hate us! Everybody's so _nice_. Nobody says what's on their mind," I waggled my glass at him, taking another shot.

I think I said I liked all the niceness. Didn't I? I didn't know. But I liked it when they were nice to me and stuff. But sometimes, I just wanted to smack some people until their heads fell off to permanently shut their cakeholes.

Then Thor pointed at me, getting my attention, "You do. That's why you're the only one of them I wouldn't tell to sod off. Mostly because you're from Asgard and you understand."

With a smile I giggled, pleased, "Really?"

"Absolutely. I have nothing, but respect for a woman who is forthright. That's a virtue."

I giggled, leaning back to take another shot. I hummed in appreciation as he did the same.

"Mm, most humans don't think so. They think I'm rude," I scoffed

Thor said, with an incredulous tone, "That's because they're _humans_: uptight, repressed." He made an 'uptight' gesture with one finger.

I frowned, "You think?"

"Please. It's no wonder they couldn't deal with the likes of you and me, love. We should have been dead hundreds of years ago… and we're the only ones who are really alive."

They couldn't handle us? We're too much for them? Could that be true? I didn't know, then again the words made me feel better. I liked them. So I smiled, gazing up at him. I saw his bright blue eyes meet my equally as blue orbs, which was nice. We were both smiling at each other.

"Here," Thor picked up the glass, held it towards me. "Ladies last."

I gazed at him sentimentally feeling my heart swell a bit, "Thank you."

He smirked, "Take it quick or my chivalry'll run out."

"No…," I put my hand on his, shakily. "Thank you." He frowned little, put the shot glass down, moved a little closer to me. "This is the first time since…," I shrugged. "It feels good to be with someone who understands." I was unable to look him in the eyes.

He said softly, "Intimately," then sighed as he gave me a grin.

"This whole time, I've been coming on all hell-bent and mad. Wanting nothing more than to avenge him, you know?" Thor nodded. I continued. "When, really, I," tears involuntarily sprung to my eyes, "can't sleep at night, thinking it has to be my fault, somehow…."

I could feel my chest heaving, breathing becoming difficult, my eyes bleary. It was hard to keep the tears in; I felt miserable and nothing was helping.

Thor shook his head, "Shh…."

Like a dam broke over, my tears flooded down my cheeks. "What if it was just pretending? What if my brother never loved me as much as I loved him?" Then I snapped out of it a little, shaking my head, feeling silly. "Ohh, I'm sorry."

"No, No," Thor gently brushed some hair out of my face, then cups my cheek in his hand. I looked at clearing my eyes with swift blinks. "He would have to be more than just the git he is, Freyja. He'd have to be deaf, dumb and blind not to love a woman like you, in a sisterly fashion."

"Then why?" I croaked.

There was a pause. I could feel more tears leaking from my eyes; I couldn't help them from coming. By this point I didn't care any longer.

Thor looked away sadly, "The two of them… they were weak, is all," he paused. "But, I'll tell you what, though," he continued to stroke my face, which felt _nice_. "I, uh, miss the water now that the well has gone dry." Now Thor had his fingers under my chin and I leant my face into his hand.

I mumbled softly, unable, yet again, to look him in the eyes, "Too hot to handle."

"Too hot…," he leant forward, very close, his forehead against mine.

I could feel my heart jumping, beating against my ribcage as if wanting to break free. My breath was shaking, trembling. I felt my cheeks heating up even further when hesitantly looked him in the eyes.

"Um… just-just one more question," I said, shakily.

"Hmm?"

I said in a soft whisper, "Can I see your sexy dance?"

A small grin spread across his face, "I'll show you mine…."

I saw his plump pink lips moving ever closer. Wait what was wrong with me? I would never do this. I would never kiss or do anything amorous with the likes of him. Those nice manly lips were centimeters were away from me, I had to stop it.

"Wait, wait," I whispered through a thick gasp of breath. "What are we doing?"

"Moving on."

Immediately, his lips were on mine. It wasn't just a little peck, either. His hands reached for my face and lifted it up to his to allow for a deeper kiss. My entire body felt hot as he touched me. The estrogen inside of me was burning to take over. My hands, on their own accord because I had no idea what was even going on, let alone had the presence of mind to do anything, wrapped around his neck as I started to kiss him back. His tongue slipped in between my lips as his hands roamed down the light fabric of my shirt until they rested on my lower back. Hungrily, his lips moved against my own.

Once I was entirely breathless and too dizzy to do anything about it, Thor pulled back with a groan. His blue eyes never left mine as I struggled to breathe again.

When I caught my breath I said, "You know I'm only doing this 'cause I'm… I'm lonely and drunk and you… smell really _really_ good."

"See? Forthright."

I nodded and initiated the kiss this time.

**Author's Note: Kind of a cliffhanger, isn't it? Be sure to review. :—D**


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